inside and out

To Feel This Vulnerable Means I'm Alive

2011-09-02T01:06:00.001-06:00

I know I've let you down. The blog has not been posted on for 3 months. But here's some food for thought. This is probably the 3rd time I've watched this, and it moves me. Each time it feels like it was made for me, for the very moment when I watched it.

Brené Brown - The Power of Vulnerability

"Let ourselves be seen, vulnerably seen
Love with our whole hearts even though there's no guarantee
Practice gratitude and joy in those moments of terror...
To feel this vulnerable means I am alive
Believe that we're enough
Stop screaming and start listening
=We're kinder and gentler to the people around us and we're kinder and gentler to ourselves"

Morning Visitor

2011-04-19T10:25:00.004-06:00

I hopped on my bike this morning. Rode to campus. Got off my bike and walked maybe 100 feet to the building where I work. What do I find on my shoe as I ride the elevator?

This.

I think the girl riding with me in the elevator, who I announced to that I had somehow gotten a traveler on my shoe, might have thought me a little strange.

I clocked in. Rode the elevator back down. Wobbled over to a patch of dirt and scooted this little guy off.

Quite the visitor.

Panda Dogs

2011-01-21T08:14:00.001-07:00

Do a googleimage search for panda dog. I dare you.

Blue Blood

2011-01-08T14:43:00.003-07:00

You know when you hear a brilliant song on the radio, but to your great dismay the radio announcer either doesn't exist or doesn't tell you what the song is? You cross your fingers every time the radio is on hoping that your song might come on, and that maybe this time you'll be quick enough to write down the lyrics or the radio announcer will give you some clue about the artist.

Well, 3 weeks after hearing that song on KOHS, my ears perked up at the familiar melody on the radio. Greg and I confirmed that it was the very song we'd spent the past few weeks searching for on the internet. Fate. I frantically search my bag for my phone to type the lyrics in my mini-search bar. Oh no. The phone isn't there. It was carelessly left at our apartment on the coffee table. Blast! Greg throws me his dysfunctional phone, which was not allowing letters h, y, or j to be typed on it today - and I write myself a text message so we could search for it later on google after the Friday night events.
3 hours later - the song is found. Located by a google search. Foals - Blue Blood. Not quite the Fleet Foxes we guessed the first time. Not any band I have heard of before, but the little boy in the video bears an uncanny resemblance to our dear Aqualung of yesteryear.

I'm still an anglophile.

Direct Flights during the Holidays

2010-12-22T09:41:00.003-07:00

To give you some context, people can locate the number for the department where I work very easily. We are Anthropology and Archaeology combined into one. So we get questions about archaeological proof of the Book of Mormon or letters from prisons saying we are Mafia Studies. You know, your everyday office business.

Yesterday morning around 10 a.m. a woman calls telling me she needs to talk to someone about the archaeological practice of digging up burial sites. She explains that she's read apocryphal texts and Jewish texts that aren't in the Bible, and they condemn this practice. She's a new member of the LDS church, and she must talk to a professor about this grave matter.

So I rack my brain for a professor who would be appropriate, but thank goodness I didn't speak too quickly because before I knew it I was having a conversation that didn't even require an "uh huh" or "yes..." or "I know" to continue on.

Here are some great one-liners:

"[People are] trashing the whole superstructure of the planet," referring to evil people in this world.

"When I was little people did experiments to me and put me on all sorts of medication...I've died. I've already been murdered."

I asked her if she had email so she could contact a professor via email. She said that no she did not and those people at AOL took over her email address. "I don't know if it's the FBI, undercover FBI, or who did it, but they ruined my life."

She then continued to say that in relation to corrupt groups like the FBI, "Groups are great until they take my blood elements."

She talked about how the LDS church emphasizes families and how wonderful families are. She said that she didn't believe that families were all they're cracked up to be. "We're the aliens. We're the aliens to God if we're not in the right family."

I passed the phone to Arlene in the office to indicate what I was dealing with. She thought it was an automated message. She listened in for 30 seconds or so and then passed it back to me. "Doesn't this remind you of your mission?" Yes.

After 15 minutes of her talking, I eventually directed her to another department, the Department of Ancient Scripture. Sorry, guys. But she got close to the redirection of her phone call and spurted out this one, "I need a direct flight to Jesus."

Who knew the holidays could be so thrilling.

Marriage

2010-12-17T15:23:00.001-07:00

Oh yeah, I got married in the past 9 months. Whoops.

Because I'm on a Blogging Spree

2010-12-17T15:10:00.002-07:00

Greg and I were listening to some sweet tunes on the radio yesterday while driving when Cyndi Lauper's oh-so-lovely ballad, Time After Time, came on the radio. We turned it up, and I had a realization - Cyndi Lauper is a creepster. Here's why:

"if you're lost you can look--and you will find me
time after time
if you fall I will catch you--I'll be waiting
time after time"

"...watching through windows--you're wondering
if I'm OK
secrets stolen from deep inside"

Total stalker or what?

rolling eyes

2010-12-17T08:56:00.002-07:00

I have never seen so many rolled eyes as I have these past 24 hours.

"101 paper?"
"Yeah."
"The boxes are downstairs on the 1st floor." (our office is on the eighth floor)
Student rolls their eyes. Goes to the elevator to make the trek 7 floors down.

Another scenario - bright yellow sign on the door. "From now - Friday 101 papers will be turned in in the TA office on the 1st floor."

I can't count the number of times the students walked into the office and asked where the 101 papers went.
3 students walk in. I point to the sign on the door politely.
"Oh so they go here now?"

What isn't clear about from now on?

CRAZY 101 STUDENTS!!!

Probably Time

2010-03-24T10:13:00.004-06:00

Here's what's been going on as of late:

Baby chickens are now giant chickens.

Storms a-brewin'

Album covers

Girls who love rocks

Chicken coop constructing

en bref.

Admission Decision

2010-02-22T10:55:00.002-07:00

I keep checking and rechecking. BYU Graduate Admission Decision/Enrollment. Huh? Are they sure they admitted me? Was there some mistake?

And every time I recheck, the answer remains the same.

I got accepted to the MSW program!

Chicks

2010-02-12T17:36:00.005-07:00

Look at the new addition to Greg's room.

I'm Qualified to Satisfy You

2009-12-07T12:53:00.005-07:00

Sometimes you've just got to love internet radio, and grooveshark.com is the quintessential internet radio in my opinion. You can pull up loads of songs you never thought you could previously listen to on the internet; you can skip them; you can smile about them; and so forth. So I've been trying to get into the holiday spirit, and thus started creating some Christmas playlists. I put the typical Sufjan Stevens Christmas music and thought, (thought bubble) "I love Joy to the World" by Sufjan Stevens, I'll see what songs come up when I select this song for my grooveshark radio." Radio button. Click. Here's what followed.

Curtis Mayfield - Break It Down
Barry White - I'm Qualified to Love You
Trevor Gordon Hall - Auld Lang Syne (the New Years Song)
Gene Kelly - Singing in the Rain
Stevie Wonder - My Cherie Amour
Versant - Out of Touch DEMO
Tori Amos - Smells Like Teen Spirit

You give them a listen. What do you think? Related to "Joy to the World" by Sufjan?

Merry Christmas! Bring some joy to the world by breaking it down, making this Christmas smell like teen spirit, and making sure that special one knows you're qualified to love them.*

Love,
Heather

*Please, play the Barry White song for them.

2009-11-14T10:24:00.001-07:00

Il y a des gens qui n'auraient jamais été amoreux s'ils n'avaient jamais entendu parler de l'amour.
- La Rochefoucault

blogging

2009-10-25T14:05:00.007-06:00

Blogging: I used to be better. Now I am horrid. But maybe I'll take it up again. That could do me some good - creating some writing, some lists, maybe some photos. Here's a little of how my weekend went.

Trip to Moab

On the road at 2:05 with Meg, Greg, and Michael
Made it to Colorful Colorado before we realized we didn't take the right turn.
Michael's laptop battery lasted the entire trip - music the whole time!
Great company - fascinating conversations
Found a stop sign that says WHOA and an old school/church yard
No campgrounds, though we checked out a few
Made the trip to Moab in about 6 hours instead of 3 1/2 or so (despite the fact that there was definitely speeding involved).
Met two people in the womens' bathroom in Moab - Kirk who was yelled at by one of the worker women for walking in, "NO NO NOOOOOOO, THAT'S THE WOMENS' BATHROOM!!!" and Laurie (who I know through Josh and hadn't seen for 3 years, except for last week when I ran into her twice in the SWKT). Laurie and Kirk were both part of our party.
Available campsite eventually located in the dark!
Dutch oven deliciousness by Greg- got eaten about 9 pm by this time we were out of stomach growls, our bodies had already run out of them. But it was a hit! Even a kangaroo rat/mouse wanted some.
Campfire songs, scary stories, games, and laughs.
Sleeping out under the stars in my mummy bag
4 am drizzling, everyone's awake, the boys are jumping up and moving everything from the table into the cars (a 2 minute walk, probably a shorter jog), girls are chilling/confused and therefore chilling in their sleeping bags on the foam pads watching the boys run around like madmen to get things in cars. They return. The rain has stopped. Greg and Michael opt for the tent that was previously unoccupied. Luke stays put 15 feet away from our huddle. Kirk moves onto the girl's foam pads.
Dog in the early-morning hours. Sniifff sniiiiffffing around our campsite.
Discovered how beautiful our campsite was - red rock, jabba the hutt surroundings.
Saw 20 jeeps in a row - maybe more
Delicate arch: one man was taking photos with a teddy bear so that the teddy bear would be ; he was not a native English speaker; another woman was doing an arch with her body - yoga moves - Meg therefore followed suit in our group photo
Climbed all over that red rock!
Made Kirk explain lots of geological information like green sediment, fault lines, and salt deposits.
Petroglyphs
Great music again!
Mushroom and Swiss burger at the Lizard Cafe on Main Street next to the classy t-shirt and dress stores. Dirt shirt. And floral grandma dresses.
Traffic held up on our depart. Why? There were women on horses herding cows across the road.
We encountered rain and snow, sweated and shivered
Passed the Pillow Talk Hotel
Sang-yelled some Cranberries at the top of our lungs
Missed pre-game traffic

Choose This Day

2009-10-12T10:43:00.004-06:00

Welcome to my life: Figuring out how to manage my time.

2009-09-21T10:10:00.001-06:00

Bloggins

Summer 2009 - Brief Recap

2009-08-28T09:39:00.001-06:00

butter

2009-08-28T08:40:00.003-06:00

I'm not sure what it is about Hathaways and storing things in the car. I can forgive the bottled water, stethoscopes, maps, freezer bags, however there are times where logic escapes me. Remember back in 12th grade when I found an entire melted stick of butter in my glove compartment? Or perhaps the can of exploded Cherry Coca-Cola in the compartment between the seats? I do.

Well, last night around 12 am, I slipped my cell phone into a harmless little compartment in my mother's car. When a text came my way, I dragged that little technological skipping stone out by its charging cord, and slipped it into my hand. Yes, slipped because I soon discovered that the once sleek design was significantly sleeker. Butter-in-compartments-in-my-car round 2 anyone?

2009-07-10T14:13:00.001-06:00

Calf on the Bangerter highway today!

suspenders

2009-07-08T11:47:00.001-06:00

I bet that man thought he was the only one wearing suspenders today on campus.

back

2009-07-07T11:35:00.000-06:00

Well, I've debated and debated it, and I think I ought to take up blogging again.

J.K. Rowling Fairy Tales

2007-12-30T18:00:00.000-07:00

This might be of interest.

This Is Real!

2007-12-30T17:26:00.000-07:00

what if

2007-12-28T16:50:00.000-07:00

What if your name were Maya, and it was pronounced Mah-YA! (like sushi-YA!) ?

beret

2007-12-28T16:06:00.000-07:00

After weeks of searching for my blasted beret - in real life, at Forever21 and similar stores - today I made a breakthrough. I found it online!

why?

2007-12-26T15:44:00.000-07:00

Why is it that the moment you start crying in a deserted-for-the-holidays university department, a second-language student suddenly appears and needs to use a stapler?

Abby Puts On Sunglasses

2007-12-25T23:43:00.000-07:00

By the time I get home there will be another niece the same age as her.

3 Weeks!

2007-12-18T09:01:00.000-07:00

since feeling is first
who pays any attention
to the syntax of things
will never wholly kiss you;
wholly to be a fool
while Spring is in the world

my blood approves,
and kisses are a better fate
than wisdom
lady i swear by all flowers. Don't cry
--the best gesture of my brain is less than
your eyelids' flutter which says

we are for each other: then
laugh, leaning back in my arms
for life's not a paragraph

And death i think is no parenthesis

-e. e. cummings

losing hair

2007-12-18T08:30:00.000-07:00

What Your Hair Is Telling You About Your Health

Serious shedding

"Seeing a swarm of strands in the shower drain every morning isn’t necessarily a cause for alarm—or a signal that anything is wrong with you. It’s totally normal to lose about 100 strands of hair every day. And even if you think you’re losing more than that, remember that your head carries at least 100,000 hair follicles, so it’s possible to collect a handful or two out of the bath or hairbrush without it visibly changing the appearance of your mane. And since those 100,000 or so follicles have different growth phases, even as several strands fall out, dozens of new ones are just on their way in to replace them. So unless you’re starting to notice visible thinning of your hair or bald spots on your scalp, chances are the loss is nothing more than natural, everyday shedding."

Hallelujah!

Faust Arp

2007-12-18T00:30:00.000-07:00

Radiohead - Faust Arp

One, two, three, four.

Wakey, wakey, rise and shine
It's on again, off again, on again
Watch me fall like
Dominoes in pretty patterns
Fingers in the blackbird pie
I'm tingling, tingling, tingling
It's what you feel now
What you ought to, what you ought to
Reasonable and sensible
Dead from the neck up
Because I'm stuffed, stuffed, stuffed
We thought you had it in you
But not, but not, but not
For no real reason.

Squeeze the tubes and empty bottles out
Take a bow, take a bow, take a bow
It's what you feel now
What you ought to, what you ought to
An elephant that's in the room is
Tumbling, tumbling, tumbling
In duplicate, and duplicate,
And plastic bags, and duplicate and triplicate
Dead from the neck up
I guess I'm stuffed, stuffed, stuffed.
We thought you had it in you
But not, but not, but not.

Exactly where do you get off?
Is enough, is enough.
I love you but enough is enough, enough
And now stop - there's no real reason.

You've got a head full of feathers.
You got melted to butter.

who

2007-12-12T14:10:00.000-07:00

who did this?
Between the hours of 5pm, Tuesday and 2:00pm, Friday.

delightful

2007-12-03T19:30:00.000-07:00

My thoughts were occupied with checklists and checklists of things I had yet to do. I walked past several people on campus, but I was stuck on my dramatic song. A towering gentleman in a black coat, slowed as I passed by him on my way to some campus errand, "Hey, I like your scarf." My wandering mind trying to conquer all of the blasted things I had to do this morning stopped. I looked up. "Oh... thanks!"

Thank goodness for people who can stop you in your worrisome thoughts.

----------

Late for class because I procrastinated a paper, I hurried up the hill that would later turn to ice by the time I got to leave campus. I heard some shouting, but cast it aside. When I reached the top, I noticed a certain gentleman in an orange coat and a face that indicated down syndrome, shouting to the world about the fantastic song he listened to on his ipod or cd player. And I smiled. Oh to live life without inhibition!

----------

I explained my paper to my little nook in my class, "Yeah... mine is on Dadaism and Radiohead's Kid A." No one said anything. I don't think they know who Radiohead is.

ice skating

2007-12-03T19:25:00.000-07:00

As I walked down the hill by the Smith Field House and the RB I thought, "What would happen if this soaking wet pavement turned into pure ice?" I pulled out a sticky note from my folder, and jotted down "ice skating on hill," and suddenly my feet slipped.

Could you imagine, an entire slippery slope on the way home? I watched where I was stepping from then on.

easier

2007-11-28T23:05:00.000-07:00

Grizzly Bear - Easier

I know
I know
the doors won't close
the pipes all froze
just let it go

Argue with me
I've got plenty of dishes and time
cords in a bind
knots that we make
fatal mistakes
let's recreate an easier time

Because I still can't find you

i ran away

2007-11-27T14:41:00.000-07:00

From the retiring of the flag on campus yesterday. I was walking down the stairs to the basement of the JFSB when the familiar sounds of the National Anthem were broadcast across the campus sound systems (those hidden speakers above buildings like the ASB and the library). I scurried down to the entrance of the basement. I didn't want to be stuck there.

Oh man. Sometimes I'm rotten.

hazardous gas

2007-11-27T08:18:00.001-07:00

I swear somebody's leaking hazardous, maybe deadly, gas into the vents in my office.

Too bad I can hear it!

breakthrough

2007-11-27T08:13:00.000-07:00

I've made a breakthrough. My body woke up naturally at 7:43AM. I hadn't set an alarm clock (which might have been tragic), but there I was, eyes opening naturally and my feet being forced to exit my little cocoon of satin sheets and onto my forest green carpet. After 2 1/2 years of 8AM work time, you'd think my body would figure out when it's supposed to be awake.

Turns out that going to bed at 11:20pm really does help (and maybe the heat being turned on).

Spare-Ohs

2007-11-15T09:23:00.000-07:00

Step 1: Read lyrics

Andrew Bird - Spare-Ohs

The finches and sparrows build nests in my chimney
what remains of the small flightless birds that you failed to protect

but their yolk isn't easy in fact it's a drag
as they're blowing through cornfields and mountains of rags

all over the suburbs
across the great lawns
crop-dusting gardens all over this town

but nobody cares when it gets in their hair
it gets in their lungs as it floats through the air
it gets in the food that they buy and prepare
but nobody cares when it gets in their hair

across the great chasms and schisms
and the sudden aneurysms
where the black ink will drip
across the crespice of your
eyes and your teeth
are worth more than you can spare-
-oh don't tell me that it just isn't fair
don't speak about the cycles of life
'cause your thoughts are so soft
I could cut 'em with a spork or a bride's knife

and the wine made our mouths too loose
such a reckless choice of words
when you tell me that I'm too obstruce
I just thought it was a kind of bird
I just stood there not saying a word

Step 2: Watch
Take Away Show: Andrew Bird - Spare-Ohs

Step 3: What are these lyrics about?

'I had 26 chickens and now I have zero chickens. I wasn’t able to keep the raccoons away from the chickens. And then for a year after that happened the chicken feathers are still around from the massacre. There’s just hundreds and hundreds of sparrows around my barn and they were taking the chicken feathers and stuffing my chimney with them to make nests. And then I would have a fire and I would see the smoke coming out and I would see little feathers reminding me of how I let down the chickens. And the whole line, “Don't speak about the cycles of life 'cause your thoughts are so soft I could cut 'em with a spork or a bride's knife.” The whole cycle of life thing was so apparent I was like, "Oh come on, this is just too obvious." Yeah, but then it also kind of talks about the implications of the cremations and the remains of animals and people floating and landing in our hair without us knowing it.'

listen to

2007-11-14T08:28:00.000-07:00

some Blonde Redhead. Go ahead, just do it.

Maybe a song like Misery is a Butterfly, 23, The Dress, Harmony, or Spring and By Summer Fall. Just a few suggestions.

Don't Worry

2007-11-13T08:28:00.001-07:00

Take the Quiz here!

I took this quiz bright and early, so it must be true.

sleep

2007-11-13T08:20:00.000-07:00

I got 8 hours last night. How am I still tired!

Ahhhh

2007-11-12T15:08:00.000-07:00

Webcams in Paris

funny

2007-11-06T08:49:00.000-07:00

Is this funny to anyone else?

art de nourriture

2007-11-05T09:38:00.000-07:00

Who even thinks of this stuff? It's great!

library bookshelf

2007-11-05T08:52:00.000-07:00

cardigan? Yes!

2007-10-26T08:48:00.001-06:00

I'm still freaking out!

France Paris

2007-10-25T08:45:00.000-06:00

Wherever You Go, There You Are

2007-10-24T11:05:00.000-06:00

I'm reading a book for Clinical Psychology called Wherever You Go, There You Are: Mindfulness Meditation in Everyday Life. And not only is it chocked full of interesting tips, but it really hits home in every chapter, dealing with the human condition. While most sections are very valuable, this one is particularly relevant.

Generosity

Try: Noticing the resistance to the impulse to give, the worries about the future, the feeling that you may be giving too much, or the thought that it won't be appreciated "enough" or that you will be exhausted from the effort, or that you won't get anything out of it, or that you don't have enough yourself. Consider the possibility that none of these are actually true, but that they are just forms of inertia, constriction, and fear-based self-protection. These thoughts and feelings are the rough edges of self-cherishing, which rub up against the world and frequently cause us and others pain and a sense of distance, isolation, and diminishment. Giving sands down such rough edges and helps us become more mindful of our inner wealth. By practicing mindfulness of generosity, by giving, and by observing its effects on ourselves and others, we are transforming ourselves, purifying ourselves, discovering expanded versions of ourselves (p.62-63). "

boys and girls

2007-10-23T10:59:00.001-06:00

From the boys of last week:

Radiohead - Weird Fish/Arpeggi, Reckoner, Videotape, Faust Arp, 15 Step, House of Cards, Knives Out
Band of Horses - Detlef Schrempf, No One's Gonna Love You
José González - Heartbeats, How Low
Phosphorescent - A Picture Of Our Torn Up Praise

To the girls of this week:

Lily Allen - Friday Night
Sia - Sunday
The Fiery Furnaces - My Egyptian Grammar
The Bird and the Bee - Again & Again
Little Dragon - Twice
St. Vincent - Landmines
Tori Amos - A Sorta Fairytale

chicken noodle soup

2007-10-23T08:48:00.000-06:00

Most mornings on my way to campus, there's a patch that smells like chicken noodle soup.

ACL revisted

2007-10-18T09:49:00.001-06:00

Just some faces we saw... ACL Press

fluke

2007-10-17T11:23:00.001-06:00

Youtube is gone again. Sorry, Rory, no Klaus Nomi. But check it out when you're off-campus! Klaus Nomi - Simple Man.

but youtube has not

2007-10-16T09:29:00.000-06:00

hypem has failed me

2007-10-16T08:32:00.001-06:00

It looks like project playlist now. :( So much for that great unveiling.

down

2007-10-08T10:47:00.001-06:00

Down comforter in the mail.

Check!

Now I will be warm the whole night.

accomplishment

2007-10-08T08:32:00.001-06:00

You know that lingering sense of accomplishment when you've completed some great task? Well, I just sat at my desk for about 3 minutes thinking I'd accomplished something amazing. Then I remembered that I wrote 2 lines from an Elliott Smith song for a blog.

Next:
Write a paper
Study for a test
Read 100 pages in my book

I'm glad my 2 liner blog is fulfilling some aspect of my life.

Passing Feeling

2007-10-08T08:29:00.000-06:00

took a long time to stand
took an hour to fall.

kanye again

2007-10-01T08:53:00.000-06:00

Even though I think it's ridiculous he pulled the race card at the Grammy's and also represented himself as Christ in his performance at the Grammy, complete with his death and resurrection? uhhhh... he can still make some pretty groovy songs.

Flashing Lights

songs

2007-10-01T08:49:00.001-06:00

running, running through my head:

You Know I'm No Good - Amy Winehouse
I Don't Trust Myself with Loving You - John Mayer (yes, he's a ridiculously guilty pleasure)
Portions for Foxes - Rilo Kiley

ahh.

cockroach brooch?

2007-09-28T08:54:00.000-06:00

Ummm... I don't even want to put the picture on my blog. Ick.

fallen

2007-09-25T11:19:00.001-06:00

falling, falling, falling

2007-09-25T08:51:00.000-06:00

goodbyes and scattered showers of thoughts

2007-09-24T08:27:00.000-06:00

"Well, I guess this is goodbye," Sommer said to me as she had finalized her de-hiring in the department.

I'm saying goodbye to two things with the same name, phonetically speaking.

- a low of 37 degrees tonight. Freakity freak!

But, don't you love the rain?

band crushes

2007-09-18T12:10:00.000-06:00

from this weekend.

(Kele Okereke from Bloc Party - he seriously has the most gorgeous skin color imaginable and that accent!)

(Andrew Bird - champion whistler, violin and guitar player, and hottie in his V neck t-shirt)

(Matthew Bellamy - mad skills and amazing show. Seriously. See Muse live).

freakity freak

2007-09-11T10:08:00.000-06:00

This weekend is going to be awesome!

clever

2007-09-11T08:39:00.000-06:00

What a clever album cover for a dance tune.
Motor - Punkture

and this too... Audion - Suckfish

the arcade fire

2007-09-06T09:05:00.000-06:00

My (hopefully) Clinical Psychology professor told our class that 14 of his 35 clients are going to the Arcade Fire show at Thanksgiving Point. See you there!

today's weather

2007-09-05T08:13:00.001-06:00

Thunder in the vicinity. Yeah!!

it's the last day of summer

2007-09-04T08:15:00.000-06:00

Seriously guys, what an amazing summer. Favorite memor(y)(ies)?

Squaw Peak and the Tiggity-T's

2007-08-31T09:39:00.001-06:00

You know you've been to some good parties when the cops keep breaking them up.

these are real

2007-08-29T11:04:00.001-06:00

Seen in real life. And I snuck some photos at Zupas.

magnet + stars

2007-08-24T15:16:00.000-06:00

Um, touring. At the Gothic in Denver, CO November 6th. Anyone, anyone?

highlights from last night

2007-08-23T08:20:00.001-06:00

"You look familiar. Were you in a band or something?" guy 1 to guy 2.
"Still am," guy 2.
"What band?" guy 1.
"We're an acappella group," guy 2.
"Moosebutter!!" Hillery says joking.
"Yeah, you're totally in Moosebutter..." I say.
"Yeah," guy 2.
"You played at my high school," me.
"That dates me," guy 2.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
(Guy 2 is at the top. His name is Weston, and he's probably 5'0.)

------------------------------------------------------------------------
"You look like someone. It will come to me," Weston to Hillery. He turns to me, "You look like a Catherine."
"Oh? I once wanted to be named Catherine in elementary school," me.
"You're a little on the regal, diplomatic side. But then there's this lunatic side to you," Weston.
"Lunatic?" I say.
"Yeah," Weston.
"Oh, thanks!"

Later in conversation...
"Yeah, that's the Catherine side of you," Weston.
"The lunatic?"
"No, I mean... I really meant crazy. Like the crazy side of you."
"But you said lunatic? Like crazy person, in an asylum?"
"See, as I've gotten to talk to you I believe you're a grounded person."
"Ohhh... hmmmm."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------
"I have 31 nieces and nephews. I'm the 8th of 9 children. All my older siblings are married and have 3 or more kids. My oldest niece is 21," Weston.
"I'm 21," me.
"See, I like to date girls your age so I can relate to her," W.

ummm...

2007-08-16T12:19:00.000-06:00

John Mayer - Heart of Life
and
Jens Lekman - Friday Night at the Drive-In Bingo.

(Hypem them)

the guns of brixton

2007-08-16T11:26:00.000-06:00

This has tons of covers of one of the Clash's best songs. So cool.

learning

2007-08-15T14:35:00.000-06:00

I have learned that I am neither organizational nor effective. Thanks, Organizational Behavior 320!

ACL

2007-08-11T13:40:00.000-06:00

Yes, I purchased tickets to this. Ahhhhhhhhhh!

recycling

2007-08-06T11:27:00.000-06:00

We're getting it, and I'm thrilled! Interested? Call Provo Utilities (852-6000). It's just $5 more a month on your utilities bill.

The Daimonic of Love

2007-08-06T08:44:00.000-06:00

In discussing theories on Personality, one of the most engaging concepts is that of Rollo May, a theorist and proponent of existential psychology/psychoanalysis. He identified the goal that all human beings have, that of integration. This integration allows us to unify the self and to confront the potential for the daimonic, which is any natural function that can take over the whole person. One daimonic that May discussed was that of Love and Sex. This excerpt is taken from my text book: Personality Theories, 7th ed. Barbara Engler, p. 388-9.

Love used to be seen as the answer to human problems. Now love itself has become the problem. The real problem is being able to love. Our world is schizoid, out of touch, unable to feel or to enter into a close relationship. Affectlessness and apathy are predominant attitudes toward life, forms of protection against the tremendous overstimulation of modern society.

May believed that our highly vaunted sexual freedom has turned out to be a new form of puritanism in which emotion is separated from reason and the body is used as a machine. Pornography and commercialization have also turned sex into a vehicle for power. We have set sex against eros, the drive to relate to another person and create new forms of life. It is now socially sanctioned to repress eros, and we rush to the sensation of sex in order to avoid the passion and responsibility that eros commands. The sexual freedom established during the 1960s and 1970 has not led to the increase in happiness that many thought would follow a freeing of sexual mores. The premature awakening of sex so prevalent in our time can lead us to dodge awakening at other levels. In the midst of wide availability of information and birth control, unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases continue. Why? The real issue is not on the level of conscious rational intentions but in the deeper realm of intentionality, where a deep defiance mocks our withdrawal of feeling.

May suggested that only the experience and rediscovery of care, the opposite of apathy, will enable us to stand against the cynicism that characterizes our day. The mythos of care points to the need to develop a new morality of authenticity in human relations.

i feel like

2007-08-03T10:13:00.001-06:00

a snob as a lemon slice floats in my nalgene.

what an encore

2007-08-03T09:40:00.000-06:00

Up Against the Wall - Peter, Bjorn and John (I can't find a current link for this song but listen to it on hypem if you don't know it, or even if you do; it's always a great listen)

Let me just say, that this is the cutest nerd-rock band ever.

They dedicated Amsterdam to Kayte for her birthday
Hillery sent a note to the guitarist (I'm not sure if he's Peter, Bjorn, or John) on our left side inviting him to the Pie.
The band members walked up to the front of the stage multiple times and allowed us to touch them. I got the lead singers hand, and it felt like something straight out of the Beatles era - the adoring fans dancing, screaming, and hands out for touching.
The crowd was getting crazy... pushing up to the stage, moshing, kids getting on stage and dancing (one girl - twice) and then getting shoved off the stage by security.
Drunk old men, and I mean old, dancing with young girls in the likeness of a boy band member
New friends - Emily was delightful.
Realizing that Shane is in the spitting image of Jeremy (Hillery told the truth). And the guitarist in PB&J (isn't that an adorable acroynm?) a less attractive version of Chris Leppert.
Dancing our little hearts away, yet again.
And this is not to leave out Apostle of Hustle which was also a great band (t-shirt a little offensive, with an image of Christ getting punched in the face. Symbolic - maybe? Or just insulting?). I just love Broken Social Scene, and Andrew Whiteman, lead guitarist for both Apostle of Hustle and BSS, is really amazingly talented. You could definitely hear bits of BSS in AoH's music.
Oh and the Pie. Like usual: delicious, good company, fun times of shouting, dancing, and chatting
But still... I can't get over how fun PB&J were. So good!

deliberating

2007-08-01T11:21:00.000-06:00

After much deliberation and it finally going on sale, I purchased this...

because Josh says I look good in red, and I'm in love with this coat.

Magnet.

2007-07-30T16:53:00.000-06:00

I fear I will love very few things as much as I love Magnet.

no more

2007-07-30T09:50:00.000-06:00

skirting around the issue. Seriously! I was empowered by the roommate confrontation about the living room, the non-putting hours in the books comment, and now... dealing with people in general. I might as well get it all out.

In our house we've been having a little trouble with something we call passive aggressiveness, what we as roommates and, dare I say, women consider the best way to channel frustration with other people into socially appropriate ways. Instead we backbite, talk about each other behind backs, say things just loud enough so others can hear our frustrations without "offending." We never really confront the issues or the little annoyances we have, hoping they'll just pass us by. Well, they don't. It would be better to mention things and make people aware (even though it takes nerve and some degree of humility) than let things build up, fester, and then explode. There are better ways. I'm sad that it's taken me 21 years to figure this out. But, here goes!

summer!

2007-07-27T12:42:00.000-06:00

Scattered thoughts about this summer:

There's nothing quite like a nectarine, if not for the taste then for the smell.
My long-time addiction for egg salad sandwiches is back. It's been years!
I'm eating sunchips that taste like churros.
We're having a Christmas in July party.
I've been doing so much dancing! It feels so good.
I love love love my family of friends.
Summer playlists. So much inspiration.
Pleasant surprises
Playing all day when I should be doing homework (and my guilt isn't terribly high, uh oh).
Lots of trips to Salt Lake
Vegetarian/vegan cuisine that is delicious: Sage's (pizza night Tuesdays and Philly Cheese Steak) and Addicted (pitas and hummus, mmmm who knew tofu everything was so good?)
Swimming - normal hours and climbing over fences afterhours
Parties galore
Meeting new people
Watching films
Dreams of traveling
Blackberries in the backyard
Free concerts

What have you enjoyed about this summer?

introvert vs. extrovert

2007-07-26T11:14:00.001-06:00

Am I an introvert or extrovert? What's your vote? And what are you?

shhhhhh

2007-07-26T10:52:00.000-06:00

I can't help but giggle when I hear, "Under my umbrella, -ella, -ella, -ella, eh eh eh," from a professor's door and then "SHHHH, SHHHH, SHHHH" from the same woman who chose the ring tone.

boy drawn badly

2007-07-25T09:26:00.001-06:00

I forgot how much I absolutely adore Badly Drawn Boy after I heard their lingering sound outside of a salon on 300 S in Salt Lake yesterday. I told Morganne I adored BDB, and she asked me about them. I realized, I haven't listened to them in ages. So I've found, there's nothing quite like rediscovering long-lost loves.

Albums:

Born in the U.K. - I haven't given it a great listen yet, but Gap was playing Nothing's Gonna Change Your Mind and I realized that I adore few musicians as much as I adore Damon Gough. Such simple melodies, simple concepts, but utterly gorgeous.

Songs to hear:

Nothing's Gonna Change Your Mind
Without a Kiss

One Plus One Is One - The one Badly Drawn Boy concert I have seen, the band played this entire album all the way through from track 1-15 and then select songs from other albums. This album goes through a range of emotions, but every song is somehow wonderful and delicate with a little bit of an edge.

Listen to:

One Plus One Is One
Easy Love
This Is That New Song
Another Devil Dies
Four Leaf Clover

Dang, just listen to the whole cd... it's all good!

About A Boy Soundtrack - my introduction to this brilliant band. I love every song on the album, mostly for sentimental reasons. The instrumental music is beautiful, and the film is embodied in every song for me. It's for this very reason that I adore soundtracks from my favorite movies so much. There's more attached to the music than just the song, there's the whole meaning, nostalgia, and loveliness of the film as well.

Songs to note:

Something To Talk About
Silent Sigh
I Love NYE
River Sea Ocean
File Me Away
A Minor Incident

Again, all the rest of the songs as well!

The Hour Of The Bewilderbeast - I fell in love with this album in the autumn of my freshman year of college. It feels like ages ago, yet so recent. The songs are so reminiscent of my favorite season, they're floating and transcendent (as Morganne would say).

Listen up:

The Shining
Stone on the Water
Once Around the Block
Magic in the Air
Pissing in the Wind
Blistered Heart

Have You Fed the Fish - I regret to say that I don't know much of this album. All Possibilities is one really great song. I intend to take this cd from an ex-friend. Or buy it myself. Or, if you have it... I'd like to give it a listen!

Anyway, case in point - listen to some BDB. You won't regret it.

just look at this

2007-07-23T12:50:00.001-06:00

Owl Tea set

Also at the anthropologie store.

touch the sky

2007-07-23T12:18:00.001-06:00

I secretly, or not so secretly, wish I could blast this song everywhere today.

In fact, I'm listening to it at my receptionist job on campus!

Kanye West (ft. Lupe Fiasco) - Touch the Sky

good company

2007-07-20T08:34:00.000-06:00

Yesterday's events go as follows:

Car rides with a Sonic stop, too-sugary (is it possible? yes.) drinks and tater tots, politics from Newsweek with Morganne and Adam
Sneaking in restrooms, asking directions from hotel attendants (yes, in Salt Lake)
Setting up blanket 5 1/2 hours before show and promptly leaving
Catching the light-rail, which is FREE downtown
Remembering London, the Tube, minding-the-gap
Photographing shoes
Sweating profusely because it's hotter on the windowless train than outside
Sitting on the train for 5 mins or so because Adam thought there was another stop. Nope, we'd hit the last.
My age forever - and the neverending search for something I love, failed.
My department with an ie - beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. Makes me want to sell a limb. AND they have This Is... books by Miroslav Sasek. Kill me now!
Addicted - the Clash and warm pita dipped in lemon pepper and hummus, tofu cream cheese bagels, turkey sandwiches vegan-style. They really have done well with the tofu. Yum!
Conveniently being in a location Ryan can pick us up
Realizing the crowd has covered all locations BUT our blanket, nice...
Allyson is back from Ohio alive and unimpregnated!
Not enjoying the Fiery Furnaces except for when I'm upfront, dancing my heart away with Hillery, Morganne, Adam, Ryan
Spotting the stoned boy that talked to us outside of Salt Lake Coffee House (or that coffee house we went to after 4th of July) about obscure musicians; he is now humping his girlfriend to the Fiery Furnaces (ack!)
Heading back to the blanket, which is now covered by people
Amy and me laying down, surrounded by heads and awkwardly dancing bodies, feeling we could get trampled any minute or have cigarette ashes flicked at our heads
Megan inviting us to the gay bar, gay bar, gay bar (Electric 6 - thanks for never allowing me to say those words without that song in my head!) for her birthday
The Pie (this deserves a post complete with pictures, all on its own) - few experiences in my lifetime have been this fun
Singing our heads off as loud as possible to EVERY song, shouting Rage Against the Machine, Phil Collins, etc., banging on the tables, yelling every time someone in our group got their pizza, dessert, or breadsticks, knee stroking, flirting behind backs, singing across the table, competing with other tables, having our party take up half the restaurant, dancing, dancing, dancing, climbing poles, singing Gold Digger
No gay bar, exhausted from the Pie
Skipping back to the car, almost taking down a bicyclist
Wonderful conversations on the way home
Medusa hair, late night chats, demanding back rubs, and finally crashing.

And all the people in between: Morganne, Adam, Ryan, Hillery, Josh, Allyson, Amy, Kristi, Eleanor, Tony, Coby, Megan, Nate, Rory, Dave, Patrick, Lucia, Claire, new friends, adventure club, and all those I forgot (you're still important, blame it on the lack of sleep!)

man!

2007-07-13T11:22:00.001-06:00

I like dance parties.

triskaidekaphobia

2007-07-13T11:07:00.001-06:00

triskaidekaphobia \tris-ky-dek-uh-FOH-bee-uh\, noun:

A morbid fear of the number 13 or the date Friday the 13th.

this

2007-07-13T09:13:00.001-06:00

is coming in the mail
and this

this

and finally, this

Movie watching, anyone?

Oscar de la Renta

2007-07-06T16:50:00.001-06:00

Is a brilliant man.

I think

2007-07-06T15:50:00.001-06:00

Boy Kill Boy
Maximo Park
The Cinematics

all sound quite similar.

fortune

2007-07-06T15:45:00.000-06:00

After stuffing our faces at PF Changs, the tray of fortune cookies came out. Everyone's said something to the effect of, "you'll be really productive", "you'll give birth to a baby," "this will be a good month for you," etc.

Mine said:
"An admirer is concealing his affection for you."

No- "he'll reveal it to you in the near future." "He'll leave you flowers on your porch." "He'll call you." "He'll ask you out." No nothing!

If you have any leads... let me know.

PS If it helps, my lucky numbers are 1 3 15 35 . 23

dang

2007-07-06T15:42:00.001-06:00

I wouldn't mind it being fall.

pride

2007-06-29T16:54:00.000-06:00

I used to pride myself on being the bravest, the boldest, the least likely to scream in a horror film. Well, I have since learned that the case is not so anymore. I recall laughing and smiling while the others around me had chattering teeth and were grabbing each other for comfort. That was me last night, grabbing Sara's hand, screaming at the slightest event. What happened to my wisdom, my cool, my calm?

I watched Silence of the Lambs without flinching. Now I can't watch that or Red Dragon without peeing my pants!

check it

2007-06-26T13:05:00.001-06:00

out
Twilight Concert Series